Goodbye. I think.

Falling.
Into nothing.
Towards no one.
I think this is goodbye.

Too Soon

You think it's too soon to be back in something like this.
But I don't want to waste any time.
This predicament, what should we do with it?
I think it's worth the risk.
You want to be alone, and I want to be near you.
But we want each other.
What kind of compromise can we find here?

Meaningful

"You're good enough for me by the way. You don't have to try so hard. You're better than what I deserve actually. You're the best. I wouldn't change anything."

"If it weren't for both of our complicated history I'd lock it down. You told my friend that you weren't good enough for me. Don't ever believe that you're not good enough for anybody. I always thought you'd be the coolest person I'd ever meet."

I felt warm inside, even though it's like you're saying goodbye.

new.

Another sleepless night. But this time, not because of me. I actually don't mind this sleepy feeling at all. I felt a little useful. I felt a little warm. I felt a little trustworthy.
Strange that someone else's worries can lessen your own.
I just want to be there. Hold their hand, let them know that I never want to leave, to please open up to me.

New Year, Finally

I wrote before that I could feel 2014 was going to be a good year.  I don't think I could have been more wrong.  It was probably the worst year of my life, to be quite frank.
There are lots of things I could say and explain, but I won't.
I just want to write down somewhere that I should not trust my gut so much because no matter what I feel, no matter how sure I am, I can be quite wrong.
I'm still reading, still going, still living.
When there is actual substance in the life I'm living, I'll update again.

Storytime

I have actually read quite a few books since my last update.  After Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn, I also read her other two books, titled Sharp Objects, and Dark Places. Both were creepily good. After I finished those books, I started and finished the Divergent series by Veronica Roth.  (Divergent, Insurgent, Allegiant). Then I started the Ender's Game series and I am currently on the third book, Xenocide. Ender's Game and Speaker for the Dead were both really great.  My reading speed has definitely slowed down a little due to other pressing factors in my life, but the train rides to and from work are always full of great reading time and I almost always miss my stop from being so engrossed.  I'm glad I have this time to myself during the day to escape to my favorite kind of place.  :)

Gone Girl

Read this book by Gillian Flynn recently after a my manager recommended it.  It made me dislike love and life a little bit, actually.

The story is about a married couple who obviously have their own issues, they feel like their love is fading.  The way they deal with it is exaggerated, but in a certain light, the same as any other couple who handles their problems.

It was a good read, and I am looking forward to see how they make this into a movie.  I know a lot of people don't like Ben Affleck, but I think he was an excellent choice to play the role of the male lead.

Just wanted to note somewhere that I read the book and enjoyed.  I would recommend it to my friends if they would read at all.  I've started Sharp Objects by the same author and am a little bit annoyed with the likeness of the characters in the two stories, but am enjoying the story nonetheless.  I may write about it when I am done.

Other than that, I just finished my temp position at Rothman Institute and finished my first week as a permanent full-time Rothman Institute employee.  My job there as Senior Payroll Clerk is pretty fun and is something I am good at.  :)
We'll see how this goes, but I don't see myself going anywhere else any time soon.

Christmas was fun, and I am super excited about all the new developments in my life and the lives of those around me.  2014 is going to be a great year.  I can just feel it.

Thank God!